wth aishah?

im so sorry but im full of guilt if i nvr tell u. i now how stupid i am to be thinkin of doin it n i noe der wont b a reason dat could b used to reason y i was even want to do it. i noe i was gg to lose u if i did it n truthfully dat was not wat i wan. i mus b crazy rite? idk y i made dat decision. mayb its my curiosity or its jus another way for me to destroy my life n stop all e hurt? idk k! everytin is so wrong for me rite now my dear. at home diff story, at skool diff story. e reason i told u even wen i noe ure gonna b dis angry is dat we rarely had secrets of our ownself n i felt guilty dat i lied to u, i betrayed ure trust, i kept secrets like dis from u n i did smth u reli dont want me to do. e reason y im reconsidering my decision again is cause i do not want to lose u pls. give me another chance. all dis while i do y best to protect u but now i hurt u. im sorry. i didnt mean it. pls 4give me? i noe rite now i suck to e max. im soooo sorry ily