my situation???

When I love you,

I want you.

Even if I can't get you,

atleast let me be there for you.

I want to let you go,

go far away from my life.

But my heart won't agree,

even if you're the worst choice.

since e skool started, i felt tat we r much apart n i think its e best as dis will allow my heart to rest n i  will take dis opportunity to kick u out of my heart n shut it for the rite one to come along one day. but dat does not mean u can hurt her like dat. u didnt kept ure promise to her n u tink i would trust u? go to hell yah. stop doing dis to ureself n jus b ureself ok? it wont hurt being ureself. im waiting for dat day to arrive. till den, jus consider dat our frenship had take sometime off. jus remember no matter what, ill always luv my frens n i do love u

i smoke? if u noe me well den ull noe if i do or i dont. if i smoke so? if i don smoke so? in bof cases u siriusly don nid to noe.

wat i ask is always relevent to my life most of e time n sometimes i ask cause i care bout u alrite so don ask me hu ask me to ask ok?

actly today nth happen cause i woke up at 1.30 in e afternoon. pathetic kan? cant help it tooo tired hahahaha btw siva remember ah tuesday

lets c if its e same hahaha. u noe wat i mean. btw it assured me dat amani is atleast ok  4 tonite wen i koll her just now. 

jgn sedih kay. if dis help u, i lost my gradmader den bof grandfaders (same time) den my step-gandmader den my anader step- grandmader. all these was continuous my darl n so i noe how it feels. smile like e sun kays?

btw wen noeing bout it, reality hits my face so hard dat i jus cant acept it. loosing a person will nvr stop in life n wat if my dearest grandmader suddenly go? dats smth dat i can nvr accept n take in all my life. i don wan dis to hapen again.

loosing somebody is like loosing smth u love so much but e hurt is soooo much deeper den dat n it reli feels like u jus wan to jump down n end ure life rather den go thru e pain. der will nvr b a person dat can replace her not even him

hu wuld pamper me n take my side if she goes? hu wuld b e 1 to take care of me if shes gone? hu to kiss b4 i go out? how if i miss her? hu wuld fill my bottle wen i go to skool?hu am i suppose to say "i lap u" to if shes gone? how am i supose to cope wen shes gone? hu to wake me up in e mornin? i luv her deeper den everybody in dis effing world. so hope to go b4 her so i don nid to go thru dat pain again after loosing bof grandfaders. i jus cant go thru dat again NO NO NO!!!!

loosing a person makes it hard 4 me to love a person cause im soo scared to loose dem. pls 4give me if im so hard on u ppl. i try not to care bout ppl but i jus cant. if i love u den i tend to be very defensive bout u. fyi.